Not a good day

Today has not been a good day. Stomach sickness like want to throw up for some reason. Can't seem to control it as I normally can. Pain pills have helped the pain, but can't get rid this the nausea or whatever it is. Having sharp pain in my gallbladder area. I am beginning to think more and more that this is cause by Sphincter of Oddi that the doctor first sent me to Dallas for. Those doctors didn't think so, but it has to be something or I wouldn't have the sharp pain over there. Plus I am scheduled to have surgery on my throat the 27th. Problem is some pain pills can cause the muscle to spasm and make my stomach problems worse. I don't know what to do. I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. I just want the crap to end and soon. Not sure I can take much more. Hell does a person have to beg for help before you can get it. \

Gastro wants to send me to pain management, but I don't want to do that. If I do that I will certainly lose my job and be in worse shape than I am right now. It's hard knowing that you're responsible for everything happening. Just like earlier today I asked my wife if she wanted to buy my 12 year old a new bed for Christmas. She told me that it wasn't in a very thin budget to do that. I of course know I am the cause of the lack of Christmas funds. I can't help it, I don't want to be this way, but can't help but feel guilty. The only place I feel comfortable with correcting this problem if it is Sphincter of Oddi is in South Carolina. Problem is I don't have the money to go there and see if they can help me. I am at a dead end.